Assassin's Creed

Arguably, it is unfair to write a brutal or scathing review about a movie based on a game that you, the writer, not being a gamer, know nothing about. Indeed, it’s that old human attitude of “I don’t understand this so I’m not going to like it”. Whilst this is a horrible attitude to have and I am silently berating myself for having it, I couldn’t help but feel this way throughout this movie. 

I know it’s hard to make a movie out of a long-running game series like Assassin’s Creed and I will say that as far as adaptations go, this is not a bad one. However, my major problem with it as a film is that it panders too much towards a target audience of gamers. True, there is nothing wrong with filmmakers doing this, but I cannot help but get a little annoyed when all of the references are intended for the gamers and just exclude everyone else. The result is that audience members like myself have a completely different experience of the film, and really this makes the movie biased and mean: a ‘gold stars to those who do their IT homework, but detention for those who don’t have a computer’ type of thing. 

Opening on the death sentence of Callum Lynch (Michael Fassbender) the film chronicles his time in a clinic where doctors are on the verge of finding the ‘cure for violence’ by housing descendents of an ancient creed that vowed to protect the Apple of Eden from falling to the hands of the Templars and forcing them, through science and technology, to relive their ancestors’ memories from hundreds of years ago. But in a predictable and slightly Avatar-esque turn of events, Lynch and the others embrace their newfound skills to pick up the cause and continue the war between the Templars and the Assassin’s Creed. 

So, my first bugbear with this movie was its being aimed too much at a particular audience. 

Second bugbear, the way in which it’s shot is very clichéd and ugh-inducing. It’s just jam-packed with low and looking-up camera angles, sweeping areal shots, and there is so much sepia in the ancient fight scenes that it took all the magic and prettiness out of the filter’s tone. 

Then there is the problem with the script and the performances. The script really needed work: it’s main problem is that it just doesn’t give any characters adequate screen time for them to have a background, story, or relationship to other characters. The result: there are so many lines that you feel are meant to be jabs at other characters, but they just don’t go the distance because the audience isn’t allowed time to come to know or like anyone. ‘Yay’ moments do not incite yays and the cutting remarks fail to gain an, ‘ooh burn’ from anyone. 

Fassbender, Cotillard, and the rest of the cast is fine, but everything is just really serious and gritty and melodramatic and it really just makes the movie boring because there’s no jokes or moments of light-heartedness to balance things out. 

To give credit where credit is due, the fight scenes were pretty impressive; stylised and lethal and the makeup team did a good job in forcing you to do a double take on Fassbender’s dual roles. But ultimately this movie suffered, in my opinion, from predictability, overused shot composition and filters, a half-hearted script, and neglect of audience members who are not Assassin’s veterans. 

Starring: Michael Fassbender, Marion Cotillard, Jeremy Irons, Michael Kenneth Williams, Denis Menochet, Ariane Labed, Charlotte Rampling, Essie Davis, and Brendan Gleeson 

Rating: M