The Muppet Christmas Carol [G]

Bitter towards humanity and alone on Christmas Eve, Ebenezer Scrooge is visited by three spirits who take him on a enlightening and sometimes frightening journey through Christmas past, present, and future so that he might change his ways and keep peace on earth and good will to all men. 

This movie is one of my earliest memories. I remember being rugged up in a warm dressing gown, curled up with a pillow in front of the heater, watching this film and covering my face in fright whenever the Ghost of Christmas Future came on. You know a film is good when it’s one that has imprinted strong memories on you from childhood. Based on the holiday classic by Charles Dickens, The Muppet Christmas Carol is a humorous and light-hearted holiday movie that’s fit for the whole family. 

Ebenezer Scrooge is a man whom all of society shy away from. Bitter, greedy, secretive, and solitary, Scrooge believes in one thing: the power of money, and he scorns any fool who goes about wishing humanity a “merry Christmas”. On Christmas Eve, he is visited by three spirits who take him on an enlightening and sometimes frightening journey through Christmas past, present, and future so that he might change his ways and keep peace and love in his heart for the rest of his days. 

The Muppets made this classic tale of haunting and spirits their own. One thing that was really nice about the movie was that a fair amount of humour was added to play against the sinister theme of ghosts and haunting. This was great because it is Dickens’ story, but lightened up a little to make it appropriate for all ages. I have read the book and it can get a little dark and grim. 

The Great Gonzo stars as Charles Dickens, following Scrooge and narrating the story as it moves through. I thought it was a clever idea to have a narrator as it verbally lets younger kids know what’s going on and it also provides much of the comic relief as Rizzo the Rat who, unfortunately, suffers much in the telling of this story accompanies Gonzo. 

Michael Caine stars as Scrooge and he was great. He’s a very different sort of Scrooge. He’s bitter and cold towards everyone, but there is some sort of subtle softness to him that makes him a) less frightening for young children, and b) quite a loveable character. I absolutely love Michael Caine. 

Starring all our favourite Muppets such as Kermit, Piggy, Bunsen, Beaker, Robin, Fozzie, Statler, Waldorf, and Sam, The Muppet Christmas Carol is a light-hearted, funny, and warm holiday movie that is fit for the whole family. It’s an absolute joy from start to finish.  

Love Actually [M]

It’s the lead up to Christmas and there’s no better time to profess one’s love. This very clever comedy explores the ups and downs of relationships in the weeks building up to Christmas. Boyfriends and girlfriends, husbands and wives, fathers and sons, and rock stars and managers all combine to make Love Actually not one love story, but many. 

THIS HAS TO BE MY SECOND FAVOURITE MOVIE OF ALL TIME! It had absolutely everything right. It was filled with wonderful stories, it’s really cleverly written, it has a beautiful soundtrack, and it has an absolutely stellar all-star cast, no joke. More than just a Christmas movie, Love Actually is a work of complete genius written and directed by Richard Curtis, which has created a film genre all its own. 

“Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow airport. General opinion makes out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don’t see that. Seems to me that love is everywhere. Often it’s not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it’s always there. Fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate and revenge. They were all messages of love. If you look for it, I’ve got a sneaky feeling you’ll find that love, actually, is all around.” - Hugh Grant

This cleverly constructed comedy explores the ups and downs of relationships in the weeks building up to Christmas. Boyfriends and girlfriends, husbands and wives, fathers and sons, and rock stars and managers, make Love Actually not just one love story, but many. 

What makes this film so brilliant? Firstly, it is one of the most cleverly written films in the history of cinema. It is made up of many different little love stories that all subtly intertwine with one another. Either the characters know other characters or the paths of certain characters cross one another. It’s very very clever writing. 

Then there are the stories themselves. The film looks at all kinds of relationships, and I mean all kinds of relationships. Office admirers, distracted husbands, oblivious wives, cheating girlfriends, egocentric rock stars, admiring managers, stepfathers, stepsons, brothers, sisters, international etc. It’s really wonderful. 

AND THE CAST! OH MY GOODNESS! This film stars Bill Nighy, Hugh Grant, Emma Thompson, Alan Rickman, Rowan Atkinson, Keira Knightly, Martine McCutcheon, Laura Linney, Chiwetel Ejiofor, Liam Neeson, Colin Firth, Martin Freeman, Kris Marshall, and Thomas Brodie-Sangster, and each performance is absolutely mesmerising. 

Filled with love, betrayal, weakness, familiar faces, and backed by a wonderfully clever script, Love Actually is without a doubt, my favourite movie. It’s one that I can watch again and again and again til the cows come home and it’s also created its own sort of genre of comedy with the way all the stories subtly intertwine. Films like He’s Just Not That Into You and Valentine’s Day take a leaf out of Love Actually’s book. 

“I feel it in my fingers. I feel it in my toes. Christmas is all around me and so the feeling grows. It’s written in the wind, it’s everywhere I go. So if you really love Christmas, come on and let it snow.”

Meet the Parents [M]

Everything is sailing smoothly for Greg Focker. He’s young, he’s got a steady job, and he’s about to propose to the girl of his dreams. But there is one catch: before asking for Pam’s hand in marriage, he must first get the blessing of her father, Jack. Although not really knowing what to expect, Greg is startled to learn that Jack is a retired CIA agent and human lie detector. As one disaster leads to another, Greg starts to doubt whether he can survive the weekend with this family, let alone the rest of his life. 

This was a film all its own. It was almost a new genre of comedy, achieving hilarity through fear and intimidation. Actually there is a word that rightly describes the specific humour of this film: schadenfreude – taking pleasure in other people’s pain. This film has you laughing, biting your nails, crying, and screaming in anger all at once. It’s a rollercoaster ride filled with more stomach churning drops than smooth ascents.  

Greg Focker’s life is sailing smoothly. He’s got a job that he loves and he has found his soul mate. After only ten months of dating, Greg decides to propose. But before asking for Pam’s hand in marriage, Greg must first get the blessing of her father, Jack. Although not really knowing what to expect, Greg is startled to discover that Jack is a retired CIA agent adept at psycho profiling, and a human lie detector. Having been told by Pam to not let it slip that they are living together, Greg’s mind soon begins to unhinge as he attempts to conceal things from her uptight and intimidating father. As one uncomfortable situation quickly escalates into disaster after disaster, Greg starts to doubt whether he can survive the weekend with this family, let alone the rest of his life. 

Ben Stiller stars as Greg Focker and I have to say that no one could have done it better. Ben just has that sort of face that can convey great uncomfortableness and, even though you do feel awful for him and what he has to suffer in this movie, you cannot help but laugh when he’s put on the spot. 

Robert De Niro stars as Jack and he was absolutely brilliant. Even as an audience member, you’re completely intimidated and terrified of him. He just exudes superiority and authority and it really is hysterical seeing him, almost literally, ripping Ben to shreds. 

Alongside Robert De Niro and Ben Stiller star Blythe Daner and Teri Polo in this wonderful comedy of endurance. Filled with disasters both domestic and outdoors, live animals, amazing carpentry, and schadenfreude, Meet the Parents is a wonderfully funny film that will make you squirm, cringe, laugh, and bite your nails in fear and anticipation. It’s in a league of its own. 

Little Fockers [M]

Greg thought the worst was over when he won over Pam’s father, Jack, and got him to accept him and his family, but now Greg and Pam have twins and their marriage is not running as smoothly as Greg would hope. To top it off, the twins are turning five and both Pam and Greg are trying to organise their birthday party. And when Dina and Jack come to stay and Jack tries to instil a sense of family control in Greg, the relatively simple matter of organising a party turns into a complete nightmare. 

Just as cringe-worthy as its predecessors: Meet the Parents and Meet the Fockers, Little Fockers was a very enjoyable film, but I did feel that it tended to get a little silly. Some of the characters just seemed completely different and there was just something, I can’t quite put my finger on it, that was lacking. It just did not feel like the other two. The scenarios leant towards the silly side and it didn’t really instil that mixed feeling of intimidation and hilarity. 

Greg thought the worst was over when he won over Pam’s dad, Jack, and managed to get him to accept him and his outlandish family. But now that Greg and Pam are married with twins, the real battle is only beginning. With the twin’s fifth birthday fast approaching, Pam and Greg are trying to get their new house renovated and ready for the birthday party. As if this isn’t traumatic enough, Jack and Dina are coming to stay with them for the lead up to the party and Jack is harbouring suspicions that Greg is no longer sexually attracted to Pam. With Jack watching his every move, his own parents fighting and in separate countries, and Pam’s ex-lover Kevin helping out with the party caper, Greg’s idea of a simple married life is fast becoming his worst nightmare. 

As I mentioned before, this film was rather funny, but there was something about it that was not akin to its predecessors. For one thing, the story was a fairly vague and somewhat flimsy base for the film with no real solid plotline. Then the performances from all the actors seemed a little tired and reluctant. Even De Niro’s character, the intimidating and manipulating Jack Byrnes, seemed a little less intimidating. There was just something lacking in all the performances. I sort of got the feeling that they were trying to be the Byrnes and the Fockers, but weren’t really feeling it. 

Starring Ben Stiller, Robert De Niro, Blythe Daner, Dustin Hoffman, Owen Wilson, Barbra Streisand, Jessica Alba, Harvey Keitel and Teri Polo, Little Fockers was a fun and entertaining movie, I will still add it to the collection when it comes out on DVD, but ultimately, I felt that it was not as involved as the first two. Everything seemed reluctant and somewhat rushed. 

Family Guy - It's A Trap! [M]

The final Star Wars spoof from the Griffin family, join Han, Chewbacca, and Leia as they battle the evil galactic empire. Meanwhile Luke is being tempted to join the Dark Side by his father. It’s the final battle: who will win? 

The final instalment in the Family Guy Star Wars trilogy was, I found, a bit of a disappointment. The humour and everything from the previous two were there, but the film just seemed rushed through, like everybody working on it just wanted it to be over. It even said in the opening credits that they weren’t even going to do Return of the Jedi and that feeling of reluctance was pretty dominant throughout the film. Don’t get me wrong, the film definitely had its moments and I did enjoy it, but it just felt more half-arsed than the other two: Blue Harvest and Something Something Something Dark Side. 

The power conks out a third time at the Griffin residence and Peter reluctantly and grudgingly regales the family with the story of Star Wars Episode III: Return of the Jedi. After saving Peter’s arse from Jabba the Hutt on Luke’s remote desert home planet, the heroes fly off the meet up with the rest of the Rebel Alliance and plan a final attack on the evil galactic Empire. While Peter, Chewie and Lois are running with bears on the forest moon of Endor, Chris has met up with his father Stewie and is trying to bring him back to the good side, but Stewie is hell bent on turning Chris to the Dark Side. It’ the final battle: who will win? 

The animation in this film was infinitely better than that of its predecessors. Much clearer and sharper, it almost looked real. 

In all honesty there really isn’t that much to report on the flick. It was quite like the other two, Meg still didn’t get a word in, and a couple of characters from other shows like American Dad and the Cleveland Show snuck into the mix. There were less moments of clever comedy, and overall, the film did give that feeling of reluctance and half-arsedness (it’s a word now). I mean, I would watch it again, I just don’t think I could watch it over and over in quick succession. 

The Dark Crystal [G]

In another time the Dark Crystal, a source of balance and truth in the universe, was shattered and the world was divided into two factions: the twisted and evil Skeksis and the gentle and wise Mystics. Now as the convergence of thee suns approaches, the Crystal must be healed or evil will rule forever. The task falls upon Jen, the last remaining Gelfling, to find the missing shard and heal the Crystal, thereby destroying the Skeksis evil empire. But can Jen’s courage prepare him for what terrors and challenges lie ahead? 

Another masterpiece from the Jim Henson Company, The Dark Crystal is a visual treat filled with amazing creatures and backed by a wonderful story. I grew up watching this film taped off the TV, needless to say you can imagine how excited I was when I finally found it on DVD. It’s a truly amazing film and one that I can easily come back to and watch again and again and again. 

In another time, in another land, the Dark Crystal, a source of balance and truth in the universe, was shattered and the world was split apart. With the shattering of the Crystal, two new races of creatures appeared: the twisted and evil Skeksis and the gentle and wise Mystics. For over a thousand years, the Skeksis have ruled, but now the world must undergo a time of testing. As the convergence of three suns approaches, the Dark Crystal must be healed or else the Skeksis will rule forever and plunge the world into darkness. The task falls upon Jen, a Gelfling and the only remaining one of his kind, to recover the missing shard of the Crystal and destroy the Skeksis evil empire by restoring the true power of the Crystal. But will young Jen’s courage prepare him for the dangerous challenges and terrors that await him? 

What makes this film so absolutely amazing is the wonderfully beautiful and terrible creatures that have come straight from the imagination of Jim Henson. The Skeksis are these amazing creatures with hardened and twisted bodies, beaks and talons, they’re almost like birds, minus the feathers and they move just as humans do. Then there are the beautiful Mystics who are aged and gentle creatures with long tails and four arms. Jen the Gelfling is the closest to looking like a human, but with pointed ears, he’s more like some sort of wood elf. 

All the characters are puppets, there are no humans featured at all, which makes the film even more amazing to behold. 

Filled with memorable characters, action, romance, sinister plots, and incredible creatures (some of which may frighten young children), The Dark Crystal is a definite favourite of mine. Its wonderful story and hauntingly beautiful soundtrack by Trevor Jones makes it a complete work of art and possibly Jim Henson’s masterpiece. I absolutely love it!

Labyrinth [G]

Whilst telling her baby brother a goblin story, Sarah accidentally wishes that the goblins would really take her crying brother away. As soon as those magic words are spoken, Jareth the Goblin King seizes baby Toby and takes him back to his castle to turn him into a goblin. Now, in order to save her baby brother, Sarah must solve the labyrinth – a treacherous maze of Jareth’s design filled with tricks and sinister creatures – and the clock is running against her.

I had never heard of this film until about five years ago. My family and I were in our local Blockbuster and Dad suggested that I rent this movie because it was from the immortal genius of Jim Henson, the man who invented the Muppets and starred David Bowie, whom I had only just discovered. Five years later, I will forever love my Dad for recommending this movie to me. It’s the imagination of Jim Henson, the wizardry of George Lucas, the musical genius of David Bowie, and nothing is what is seems. I freaking LOVE this movie! 

After being harassed into babysitting her baby brother Toby whilst her parents go out and enjoy themselves, Sarah starts telling her screaming brother a bedtime story about goblins. Whilst telling the story, she accidentally wishes that the goblins really would take the screaming child away. As soon as these magic words are spoken, Jareth the Goblin King seizes baby Toby and takes him away to his castle to turn him into a goblin. Now, in order to save poor Toby, Sarah must solve the labyrinth – a treacherous maze of Jareth’s design, filled with sinister tricks and frightening creatures. And, as with any adventure worth having, time is against her. 

As with many of the Muppet films, Labyrinth stars both humans and puppets working side by side. A nice blend not dissimilar to Mary Poppins or Bedknobs and Broomsticks, though not really the same thing. 

David Bowie, as well as writing the songs featured in the film, stars as Jareth the Goblin King. He is just so gorgeous isn’t he? Sadly enough, if you’re a girl and you watch this, you won’t be able to keep your eyes off the bulge in his tight pants. His voice has a certain sinister edge to it, one that is somewhat hypnotising, making him the most perfect Goblin King. With his glam rock makeup and very glam outfits, he is my favourite thing to watch in this movie. He’s a delight to watch from start to finish. 

Jennifer Connelly stars as Sarah. Watching this film nowadays, I cannot get over how young she looked. She was about fourteen when she did this film, that’s true talent right there. Playing the role with the perfect amount of drama and comedy, she’s absolutely mesmerising to watch. 

Filled with memorable characters, action, glam rock songs, puppets, and backed by a wonderful story, Labyrinth is an absolute classic that, I think, every child should be brought up on. Seriously, I reckon Jim Henson films are in the same league as Walt Disney. 

You remind me of the babe. What babe? Babe with the power. What power? Power of voodoo. Who do? You do, Do what? Remind me of the babe. 

The Young Visiters [G]

When the loveable and innocent Alfred Salteena falls head over heels in love with the pretty face of young Miss Ethel Montacue, he is desperate to woo and marry her. But Ethel only sees Alfred as her ticket to high society and this could not be further from the truth. Alfred’s only connection to high society is his somewhat flimsy acquaintance with Lord Bernard Clark, with whom he invites Ethel and himself to stay. Desperate to impress Ethel, Alfred leaves her in the company of Lord Clark so that he might seek tuition in the ways of aristocracy from the Earl of Clincham. But while Alfred is bettering himself, Lord Clark takes a shine to young Ethel and seeks to make her his wife. Can Alfred get back in time to propose to Ethel first? 

I came across this film whilst I was sorting the comedy section at work. A BBC production set in Victorian England and packed with a bunch of actors I liked, I wondered why I had never heard of it before. I therefore, took it home and only had time to watch it this morning. Unfortunately, for all its fine actors and potentially engaging story, I found that it was a rather mundane comedy that was not very funny at all. 

When the loveable and innocent  Alfred Salteena falls head over heels in love with the pretty face of young Miss Ethel Montacue, he is determined to woo and marry her. But Ethel only sees Alfred as her ticket to high society and this could not be further from the truth as Alfred’s only connection to high society is his somewhat flimsy acquaintance with Lord Bernard Clark. In an attempt to impress Ethel, Alfred invites himself and Ethel to stay with Lord Clark, who immediately takes a shine to Ethel and recommends that Alfred travel to London to seek tuition in the ways of aristocracy from the Earl of Clincham. But whilst Alfred is bettering himself, Ethel’s faint interest in him vanishes and Lord Clark becomes intent on making her his wife. Can Alfred get back to propose to Ethel in first? 

Jim Broadbent stars as Alfred and he was rather enjoyable to watch, although his was a character that you could easily get sick of. With his hangdog expressions and somewhat over exaggerated clumsiness, you did feel sympathetic towards him, if only for a short time. 

Hugh Laurie plays Lord Bernard Clark and his character was not so dissimilar to that of Alfred. Although richer, more handsome, and more gentlemanly than Jim, Hugh also sported confused and sometimes melancholy expressions and I feel that there was something left wanting. 

Also featuring Bill Nighy, Sophie Thompson, and Geoffrey Palmer, The Young Visiters was a mundane and almost dreary comedy that really did not feel like a comedy at all. The story had the potential to be engaging, but alas, it only turned out to amount to ninety minutes of subdued performances, simple characters, and a rather melancholy ending. I don’t have any desire to see it again.  

The Incredibles [PG]

Bob Parr and his wife Helen were once among the city’s most beloved superheroes, saving lives and battling evil on a daily basis. But in a bizarre turn of events, the city has decided that the supers cause and cost more damage then they’re worth and for fifteen years Bob and Helen have been forced to adopt civilian identities and lead “normal” lives with their children Dash, Violet, and Jack-Jack. However, Bob is having difficulty adapting to normal life and wishes for nothing more than to relive the glory days. And when he is sought out and offered an assignment by a mysterious woman named Mirage, he leaps at the chance to be super again. But Bob’s assignment soon turns into a nightmare, one where his family becomes entangled. Has the former Mr Incredible finally met his match? 

The genius that is Pixar has done it again with this wonderfully funny, emotionally engaging, and refreshingly original animated film. With an original story as its backbone, a clever and funny script as its central nervous system, and memorable characters as the organs that keep it functioning, The Incredibles is a fantastic family film that packs a punch. 

Bob Parr and his wife Helen were once amongst the city’s most beloved superheroes, saving lives and battling evil on a daily basis. But in a bizarre turn of events, the city has decided that the supers cause and cost more damage than they’re worth and for fifteen years, Bob and Helen have been forced to adopt civilian identities and lead “normal” lives with their gifted children Violet, Dash, and Jack-Jack. While Helen is trying to keep the family’s talents under control, Bob is distracted and having great difficulty adapting to normal life. All he wants to do is relive the glory days and when he is sought out and offered a special assignment by a mysterious woman named Mirage, he leaps at the chance to be super again. But Bob’s “assignment” soon turns into a super’s nightmare as a new super villain emerges and threatens the city, first ridding it of all its beloved superheroes. And when his family are brought into the plot, things go from bad to worse. Has Mr. Incredible finally met his match? 

I’ve mentioned that the story is wonderfully original and that the script is very enjoyable, but what really sets the film on fire is the visual gags and the characters. 

Firstly, it’s always awesome seeing people with powers. It makes you bubble with excitement, but also feel a little envy. The Incredible family have a range of exciting and effective powers: Bob, formerly named Mr. Incredible has super strength. Helen, formerly named Elastigirl, can stretch her body to great lengths without injuring herself. Violet, their eldest child and only daughter, can become invisible and create indestructible force fields. Dash, their first son, can run extremely fast, even on water. How cool are those powers? And when you see them in action, you just can’t help but quiver with excitement. 

Some of the visual jokes are very clever too. One particular one that stands out for me is when Dash is running through the jungle, being chased by two bad guys. The scene is exactly the jungle chase scene out of Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi. Quite a few movies are sampled in this one, adding another layer of subtle humour to the piece. 

Starring Craig T. Nelson, Holly, Hunter, Samuel L. Jackson, Wallace Shawn, and Jason Lee, The Incredibles is the perfect family movie filled with action, romance, superpowers, volcanoes, giant robots, and great battles. A knockout every time.  

Razzle Dazzle [PG]

Discover the world of competitive dance. Mr Jonathan and his troupe of Jazzketeers are out to open people’s eyes to the injustices of the world, one audience at a time. When they make it into the Grand Final of Australia’s most prestigious dance competition, the pressure is on to come up with a dazzling routine that will also broaden the minds. But the hard work is about to take its toll on Mr Jonathan and his girls. 

I was told by my aunt and young cousins to sit down and watch this film so, finally, one day I took their advice. Both my mum and my dad sat down and watched it with me and we all absolutely loved it! It’s fun and clever Aussie comedy! It’s films like this that make me feel patriotism. Damned proud to be an Aussie “aw yeah”! 

Mr Jonathan is a man who loves dance and choreography and hates oppression and injustice of any kind. With stars in his eyes, he plans to enlighten the world one audience at a time and who better to do that than his troupe of Jazzketeers. When he and his girls make it into the grand Final of Australia’s most prestigious dance competition, the pressure is on to really dazzle their audience because, when it comes to the theatre, winning is everything. 

What immediately hooks you to this film is the way that it is structured. It is filmed as a documentary, filled with interviews with the characters and footage of the performances. 

The other brilliant thing about it is the separate stories that make up the film. A dance troupe trying to win a Grand Final can seem like a boring plotline, but as the characters become more determined, some serious drama and sometimes, sinister stories bloom, keeping the audience’s attention. 

Not to mention the characters! Some of the characters that dominate the screen in this film go from one extreme to another and some are positively cringe worthy. It’s all absolutely wonderful. 

Starring Ben Miller, Kerry Armstrong, Denise Roberts, Tara Morice, Jane Hall, Nadine Garner, Toni Lamond, Noeline Brown, Barry Crocker, and Leo Sayer, Razzle Dazzle is a wonderfully clever and cute comedy about what some people will do to win. 

Filled with dance routines, sparkling costumes, good music, memorable characters, and nail-biting anticipation, it’s a fantastic film that will have cheering, cringing, gasping, and looking on in awe. You’ll be bubbling with excitement by the end.

Little Nicky [M]

Meet Nicky. He’s the lovable son of the Prince of Darkness with a kind heart and a speech impediment. His father has ruled Hell for ten thousand years and his two evil brothers have decided that it’s time for him to retire…willingly or not. When the two brothers escape from Hell, barring new souls from entering in the process, their father falls dreadfully ill and it’s up to Nicky to get his brothers back down to Hell where they belong. But Nicky’s never been to Earth, he’s never even slept over at another dude’s house! 

I’m going to come clean out and say that I am not an Adam Sandler fan. I don’t mind him, but there is such a thing as an overdose and I personally think that one can get sick of Adam rather quickly. I hired this movie because it seemed like an interesting story and had some pretty good actors in it. I don’t regret watching it, but I don’t think I’ll want to watch it again for quite some time. 

Meet Nicky. He’s the lovable son of the Prince of Darkness with a kind heart and a speech impediment. His father has ruled Hell for ten thousand years and his evil brothers believe that it is time for him to retire… willingly or not. The two brothers escape from Hell and head for Earth, freezing the Gates and barring new souls from entering Hell in the process. With no new souls able to get in, Nicky’s father falls desperately ill and begins to fall apart…literally. Wholeheartedly concerned for his father, Nicky takes on the challenge of going to Earth and bringing his brothers back to Hell where they belong. But Nicky has two problems: his brothers are smarter, stronger, and eviler that he could ever dream to be and he’s never been to Earth before. He’s never even slept over at another dude’s house! 

The somewhat redeeming features of this film were the costumes, the makeup, and the story. It’s an original idea and does have the potential to make a good film. Sadly, it got reduced to 87 minutes of sex, gay, and drug jokes and just general crude humour. 

I will admit that the film had its moments where it was actually clever. Like when Nicky’s brother Adrian turns into a bat and the secret weapon that was given to Nicky by his mother, the only weapon that will defeat Adrian, turns out to be Ozzy Osborne (this must have around the time when he famously bit the head off a real bat thinking it was a fake.) 

Starring Adam Sandler, Reese Witherspoon, Harvey Keitel, Patricia Arquette, Rhys Ifans (who could not save this movie even though he had the hottest costume and was the best actor), Rodney Dangerfield, Tommy Lister, Dana Carvey, and Jon Lovitz, Little Nicky was a mildly entertaining comedy with a good storyline that was beaten down by sex, drug, and gay jokes and bad computer effects. I don’t regret watching it, but I don’t feel the need to watch it again. 

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World [M]

Meet Scott Pilgrim. He’s charming, jobless, and a bass player for the garage band Sex Bob-omb. One day he meets the girl of his dreams – literally. But there is one catch into winning the affections of Ramona Flowers: he has to meet and defeat her seven evil exes! 

I hired this movie out yesterday not knowing what to expect. I hadn’t seen the trailers for it, I obviously missed it at the cinemas, I only knew it was a superhero-themed film with Michael Cera in it. What I received when I sat down to watch it last night was 108 minutes of delightfully off-centre comedy. As soon as I got into work this morning, I bought myself a copy. Loved it! 

Meet Scott Pilgrim. He’s charming, he’s jobless, and he’s the bass player for the garage band Sex Bob-omb. One day he meets the girl of his dreams – literally. With enchanting brown eyes and her bubblegum pink hair, Ramona Flowers has Scott obsessed from the first moment. But, unbeknownst to Scott, there is one catch to winning Ramona’s affection: he must meet and defeat her seven evil exes! 

Hamish Blake has said that this film was “one of the coolest films I have ever seen” and I am inclined to agree. What makes the film so memorable is the fact that it is so different, particularly in regards to the story and the special effects. 

It is based on the graphic novels by Bryan Lee O’Malley and the way the effects are used in this film reflect that. For the duration of the movie, words and onomatopoeia pop up and flash across the screen, similar to the Batman movie of the 60s, but much more subtle and sophisticated. Words such as “thonk”, “ring”, and “ding dong” accompany the characters’ actions and it gives the film more of a comic book vibe, which is hugely fitting seeing as the it’s about superheroes and the central character is a bit of a dork. 

Michael Cera stars as Scott Pilgrim and he was absolutely brilliant. Adorkable is the appropriate word to use really. He has such wonderful timing, not just for comedic pauses, but also for dragging words and stuff. No one but Michael could have played this character. 

Featuring familiar faces such as Jason Schwartzman, Chris Evans, Alison Pill, Mark Webber, Anna Kendrick, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, and filled with action, computer graphics, the Universal theme music, knockout action, and memorable characters, Scott Pilgrim vs. The World is a wonderfully funny and genuinely unique film that needs to be watched at least once. Even people who aren’t interested in computer games or comic books, will appreciate the cleverness and refreshing originality of this film. A must-see at any rate. 

Leap Year [PG]

When her boyfriend surprises her with a pair of earrings rather than the engagement ring she had expected, Anna decides to take matters into her own hands. Following him on a business trip to Ireland, she plans to propose to him on February the 29^th: Leap Day, a romantic folk tradition that results in good luck. But the luck of the Irish proves to be holding out on Anna as her plane gets caught in a storm and is forced to make a landing in Dingle, a little country town in the middle of nowhere. With the odds against her, Anna hires a bitter Irish cynic to drive her to Dublin, but as the pair grows to dislike each other more and more, it’s going to prove a long journey. 

I had never even heard of this film, but it came into work and I have a bit of a thing for Amy Adams so I figured “why not?” It was a cute and sometimes funny romantic comedy, but nothing spectacular. 

When her boyfriend of four years surprises her with a pair of earrings instead of the engagement ring she expected, Anna decides to take matters into her own hands. Following him on a business trip to Ireland, she plans to surprise and propose to him on February 29^th: Leap Day, the only day, according to Irish folk tradition, a woman can propose to a man, bringing good luck to the couple. But the luck of the Irish proves to be against Anna as her plane gets caught in a storm and is forced to make a landing in the remote country town of Dingle, miles and miles away from Anna’s boyfriend. Determined to see her plan through, Anna hires a grumpy and cynical innkeeper to drive her to Dublin. But with the two growing a greater detestation towards each other; it’s going to be a long and bumpy ride. 

Amy Adams gives a structured, sophisticated performance, but no matter what she does, she cannot help but be cute. Even when she’s arguing persistently or drinking heavily, there is something about her that just makes you go “aw.” I do like Amy Adams. 

I think the film’s best feature was the beautiful Irish scenery. The greens, the overcast weather, the blue skies, the golden cliff faces, and the shimmering reflection of the sun off the water, it’s all very breathtaking. I want to go to Ireland so bad now. 

Filled with beautiful scenery, unlucky mishaps, romantic intentions, and heaps of superstitions, Leap Year was a cute and sometimes funny romantic comedy. Worth watching, but I don’t feel the need to have it in my collection. 

Meet the Fockers [M]

After overcoming the impossible feat of meeting his fiancé’s parents, Greg has finally been accepted into the Burns Family Circle of Trust and he and Pam are due to be married. But before the two can tie the knot, Greg must face another terrifying obstacle: introducing Pam’s parents to his. As if this is not enough, Greg discovers that Pam is pregnant and he must keep it a secret from her father. Unfortunately her dad is a human lie detector, which is going to make this weekend the longest of Greg’s life. 

Even better than its predecessor, Meet the Parents, Meet the Fockers is a wonderfully refreshing and hysterical comedy about how you can’t pick and choose your family. Filled with memorable characters, many a mishap, embarrassing anecdotes, and heaps of familiar faces, it’s a film that you can always come back to and enjoy more than the last time. 

After a gruelling and horrific endeavour to win over Pam’s father, Jack, Greg has finally earned his place in the Burns Family Circle of Trust, With the Holy Grail that is Jack’s blessing, Greg and Pam are finally engaged to be married. But before they can tie the knot, there is one other obstacle to overcome: introducing Pam’s parents to Greg’s. As if a weekend with both Pam’s and his parents isn’t daunting enough, Greg soon discovers that Pam is pregnant and it becomes hugely important that Jack does not find out. What with trying to avoid embarrassment from his parents and keeping Pam’s pregnancy a secret from her human lie-detector of a father, it’s going to be the longest weekend of Greg’s life. 

What makes this film so bloody brilliant is the characters and the chemistry between the actors. Dustin Hoffman and Barbra Streisand, who play Greg’s parents, are absolutely delightful together. Both are very free-spirited, smothering, eager to please, and incredibly likeable. They are without a doubt, the best movie parents I have ever seen. The chemistry between the two of them is just so perfect and genuine, causing you to love them as soon as you meet them. 

The vibrancy of Dustin and Barbra is perfectly opposed by the mundane and straight-jacketed characters of Pam’s parents, played by Robert De Nero and Blythe Daner. Robert is just so uptight and sometimes intimidating and it’s hugely entertaining to see him and Dustin go head to head. You literally go from one extreme to another in 60 seconds, and it makes for great screen entertainment. 

It’s rare to find a film that is really driven by its characters, but Meet the Fockers is the exception and it really is wonderful to see the story and the mishaps flourish due to clashes with these memorable characters. 

Starring Ben Stiller, Robert De Nero, Blythe Daner, Dustin Hoffman, Barbra Streisand, Teri Polo, and Owen Wilson, Meet the Fockers is a laugh-out-loud comedy about how you can’t pick and choose your family. Filled with memorable characters, embarrassing and cringe-worthy mishaps, live animals, and a cursing baby, it’s a classic film that you can always come back to and enjoy more and more. 

101 Dalmatians [G]

Roger and his Dalmatian Pongo are two bachelors who discover their soul mates in Anita and her Dalmatian Perdy. Soon after becoming a happily married couple, Perdy gives birth to a litter of fifteen puppies, which immediately catches the attention of Anita’s boss and fur-worshiper Cruella De Vil. Enraged that Anita will not sell the puppies to her, Cruella steals them so that she might have their skins to make a fashionable coat for herself. But with Pongo, Perdy, and all the dogs of London on her tail, Cruella’s plan is about to bite back. 

The story is a timeless classic and as good as the Disney animated film was, this movie does top it. Filled with wonderful actors, adorable animals, and physical comedy, 101 Dalmatians will have you seeing spots. 

When Roger and his dog Pongo lay eyes on Anita and her dog Perdy, it’s love at first sight. Shortly after becoming a happily married couple, Perdy gives birth to a litter of fifteen puppies, which immediately catches the attention of the evil Cruella De Vil: fur-worshipping fashion designer and Anita’s boss. Enraged that Anita will not sell the puppies to her, Cruella has them dognapped, with the intention of skinning them and making a fashionable fur coat for herself.  When Pongo and Perdy learn that they’re puppies have been stolen, they immediately alert the city of London, using the Twilight Bark to receive any news or sightings. When word comes back to them that the puppies are in an abandoned mansion out in the countryside, Pongo and Perdy embark on a huge rescue mission and, with all the animals of London on their side, they’re about to bite Cruella back. 

Glenn Close stars as Cruella De Vil and she was absolutely fabulous. Very stylish, very classy, but also extremely frightening, you would not want to get on the wrong side of Glenn in this movie. She stole every scene and with her amazing costumes, she literally dominated the screen. She was positively and perfectly maniacal. 

Starring Jeff Daniels, Joely Richardson, Joan Plowright, Hugh Laurie, and Mark Williams, 101 Dalmatians is a wonderful family movie that will have you laughing, cringing, swooning, “aww”-ing, and seeing spots. Love it. 

Van Helsing [M]

Legendary monster-hunter Van Helsing is sent by the Vatican to Transylvania, a land being terrorised by a terrible evil: the vampiric Count Dracula. Joining forces with Anna, a Gypsy Princess who is determined to end an ancient curse on her family by defeating the infamous vampire, Van Helsing continues his quest to rid the world of evil, one monster at a time. 

Admittedly, there is nothing really spectacular about this movie it’s just a bit of an action romp with a couple of monsters thrown in. I love it because it has a healthy balance of action, romance, horror, and comedy. It’s really just a bit of fun. 

Legendary monster-hunter Van Helsing is sent by the Vatican to Transylvania, a land being terrorised by an unbeatable evil: Count Dracula. Once arriving in Transylvania, Van Helsing joins forces with Anna, a Gypsy Princess who is determined to end an ancient curse on her family by killing the infamous vampire. But the quest to rid the land of Dracula takes a turn when Van Helsing and Anna discover the vampire’s offspring, born dead, and learn that he is recreating the infamous Dr Frankenstein’s work by trying to bring them to life. As each attempt fails and Dracula becomes more determined, time is running out for Anna and Van Helsing. 

The story was little bit all-over-the-shop in that it is really centred around its characters, probably the most famous character in English literature: Abraham Van Helsing, Count Dracula, Frankenstein’s Monster, and the Wolf Man. But the performances, action, and comedy help cover the film’s indiscretion. 

The gorgeous Hugh Jackman stars as Van Helsing. This is the film where I first fell in love with Hugh. He delivered a knockout performance filled with perfect comedic timing, heaps of action, loads of stunts, a little romance, and genuine chivalry. He really dominates the screen. Love him! 

Starring Kate Beckinsale (who gets to wear the hottest outfit ever!), David Wenham, Robbie Coltrane, and Richard Roxburgh as Count Dracula, Van Helsing is a great film filled with action, adventure, romance, drama, monsters, cool weaponry, and comedy. Perfect for a Saturday night in with pizza and booze.  

I Love You Too [M]

Jim is a man who has never grown up. Being reasonably attractive and incredibly smooth, his life is a string of pretty girls and one-night stands. But then he meets Alice and falls head over heels in love with her. But 3 years into the relationship, he still has not said the words “I love you” and Alice is beginning to question their future together. 

This was one of those movies that was advertised everywhere. Every movie you went and saw would show this trailer, months before the movie was to be released. Needless to say that it was a film that pretty much everyone had heard of. I wasn’t really all that interested in seeing it to be honest, but I came across it at work and thought “why not?” It’s a clever little film, rather romantic, but I don’t really agree with those people who say that it’s really funny. It had its moments definitely, but on the whole it was more lovely than funny. 

Jim is a man who has never grown up. Being reasonably attractive and incredibly smooth and charming, his life has been string of pretty girls, bars, and one-night stands. But then he meets Alice and he falls head over heels in love with her. But 3 years into the relationship, he still has never said “I love you” and Alice, having doubts about their future together, dumps him. All he wants to do is get Alice back, show her how he really feels, and he finds the help he needs in an incredibly romantic stranger named Charlie. With Charlie educating him, Jim is about to learn what it really means to love someone and say those ever-so-important words: “I love you too.” 

What was really lovely about this film was the fact that it looked at different kinds of loves and relationships. There is the relationship between Jim and his sister. There’s the bromance between Jim and his best mate Blake. Obviously there’s the romance between Alice and Jim. And there is also (and probably the most beautiful) friendship that forms between Jim and Charlie. The story was really quite clever how it incorporated all that love. 

Starring Brendan Cowell, Peter Dinklage, Peter Helliar, Yvonne Strahovski, Megan Gale, and harbouring an appearance from Hamish Blake, I Love You Too was a very clever and romantic comedy that addressed all kinds of love. Not the funniest thing I’ve ever seen, but worth watching at any rate. 

Inception [M]

Dom Cobb is the best there is at extraction: stealing valuable secrets inside the subconscious during the mind’s most vulnerable state: dream state. His skills have made him a coveted player in industrial espionage, but have also made him a fugitive and cost him dearly. All he wants to do is go home to his children, and his opportunity arises when he is offered a very important, but also very dangerous job. He must achieve the impossible: inception: planting an idea in the mind rather than stealing one. If met with success, Cobb and his team could pull off the perfect crime. But no planning or expertise can prepare them for a dangerous enemy that seems to predict their every move: an enemy that only Cobb can see coming. 

I just missed this at the cinemas and I was sooo pissed off that I did. From the time it finished to the time it came out on DVD, all I heard was how brilliant, how original, how mental, how ingenious, and what a mind trip it was. Needless to say, when it finally came into work early this week, I could not freaking wait to grab a copy and become enthralled. THIS MOVIE WAS SO BRILLIANT AND SO AWESOME THAT IT SHOULD BE ILLEGAL!!!

Dom Cobb is a very special kind of thief. One that makes his living through extraction: stealing valuable information and secrets from inside the subconscious during the mind’s most vulnerable state: dream state. His skills in this field have made him a coveted player in industrial espionage, but have also made him a fugitive and cost him dearly. All he wants to do is go home to his children and see their faces, and his opportunity arises when he is offered a very dangerous job. He is asked to achieve the impossible: inception: planting an idea in the mind rather than stealing one. If met with success, Cobb and his team could pull off the perfect crime. But no amount of planning or expertise can prepare them for a dangerous enemy that seems to predict their every move. An enemy that only Cobb can see coming.

My head is still reeling and my entire body is still buzzing with awe after watching this movie. It had everything right! It was packed to bursting with action, comedy, wonderful characters, sharp story twists and plot misdirection, and was just a fantastic story. Not dissimilar to The Bank Job really (just a lot more of a mind trip).
The basic story, the root of the entire thing is simple enough to understand, but what makes the film so brilliant and so wonderfully confusing is the way that the story is constructed. It’s like an onion really; there are a large amount of layers, each one with a different story or goal to be achieved.
And what’s really great about it is that the characters take time to verbally explain the mechanics of the whole thing.
Not to mention the all-star cast that the film harbours: Leonardo DiCaprio, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Ellen Page, Ken Watanabe, Tom Hardy, Marion Cotillard, Tom Berenger, Pete Postlethwaite, Cillian Murphy, and Michael Caine. HOW CAN YOU NOT WANT TO WATCH IT?
An epically brilliant story filled with plot misdirection, paradoxes, action, comedy, drama, and an ending that will set your mind whirring and shivers running up your spine, Inception is one of the best films to grace our screens in 2010.
There is no question, it is a MUST-HAVE in ANY FILM COLLECTION!!!

Batman Returns [M]

Gotham can sleep safely knowing that Batman is protecting the fair city. But when two new villains; the Penguin and Catwoman burst onto the scene, the dark knight has his work cut out for him. Facing two villains who have joined forces in order to turn Gotham against its protector, is going to be no easy feat. Is the caped crusader up to the task? 

A little darker and saucier than the first movie, but nevertheless just as twisted and brilliant, Batman Returns is a rare sequel that meets the standards of its predecessor. Filled with hot costumes, haunting music, masses of penguins, and plenty of action and suspense, it’s another classic. 

With Batman on the watch, the city of Gotham can sleep soundly. But this changes when two new villains make their presence known. The Penguin, a disfigured baby abandoned by his parents, seeks to punish Gotham by drowning all first-born sons. Catwoman, a poor secretary who was killed by her boss, seeks revenge. Together, the two concoct a plan to take out Batman by turning Gotham against him. Facing two villains and a city that no longer trusts him will be the toughest challenge the dark knight will face. 

Again, directed by the immortal genius Tim Burton and packed with heaps of familiar faces, suspense, eccentric characters, romance, and action, Batman Returns is quite easily my second favourite of the Batman movies. It did get a bit darker and housed more violence than the first one, but that’s the style and quite frankly, despite the PG rating, I don’t think the first Batman was really appropriate for kids under the age of 13. 

Michael Keaton reprises his role of the caped crusader, this time with a more emotional and reflectively meaningful edge. 

Danny DeVito is the Penguin and he was great. Frightening, child-like, aggressive, and sometimes comic, he delivered a knockout performance. 

Michelle Pfeiffer is Catwoman and she is just sooo sexy. With her fetish-style skin-tight outfit, her boots, and her whip, she’s absolutely deadly. Like Michael, playing a dual role (one with a mask, one without) Michelle delivered a great range of emotions, going from sexually teasing to manically laughing and crying in 60 seconds… wow, absolute brilliance. 

Also starring Michael Gough and Christopher Walken, and with a haunting soundtrack by Danny Elfman, Batman Returns is a great follow-on film packed with action, sinister plots, sexual teases, murder, live animals, brilliant costumes, and romance. An instant classic. 

The Runaways [MA]

Group of girls meet, jam, and start a band. But it’s not that easy to rock out when girls weren’t meant to take the stage. Falling under the Svengali-like influence of rock impresario Kim Fowley, the all-girl group The Runaways, make a name for themselves and are met with outrageous success. But rock n roll fame comes with a price, and a rather steep one at that. 

This movie is so fucking rock n roll.  It’s packed with defiance, great outfits, sex, drugs, and the most awesome soundtrack. What more can you possibly want? 

A young musician by the name of Joan Jett starts an all-girl band called The Runaways. Early on in their career, the band is taken under the wing of Kim Fowley, who exercises a Svengali-like influence over them. Fame and success are quick to engulf them, but the girls are about to learn that being rock goddesses comes at a price. 

This movie had everything right. The music, the costumes, the makeup, and the performances were all beyond brilliant. It’s set in the 70s so all the great fashions are around. The tight and shiny pants, the leather jackets, the sparkling heels, and the fantastic shimmering makeup. If you’re a fan of 70s outfits and makeup, grab a copy of this flick and marvel. I seriously wish I’d been around in the 70s, what a fantastic era. 

Kristen Stewart stars as Joan Jett and she was fucking awesome. With her relaxed and sometimes “fuck you” attitude, she did not shy away from anything in this film. A complete 180 degrees away from the heroine of Twilight, Kristen really shows what she’s made of in this flick with her guitar playing, growling, and occasional girl-on-girl romance. She really is a great actress. Rock on girl! 

Dakota Fanning, who in recent years has seemed to resurface, stars as Cherie Currie, the cherry bomb herself. Dakota delivered a knock-out performance as her character slowly declined into the despair and selfishness that comes with fame and fortune. Sporting the best outfits and makeup, Dakota’s performance was absolutely mesmerising, I could not look away from start to finish. Very rock n roll. 

Then there’s the absolutely awesome soundtrack. Not only do we get to hear Dakota and Kristen belt out the classic songs like Cherry Bomb and Queens of Noise by the Runaways, the film also whips out some Iggy and the Stooges, David Bowie, and even a little Peggy Lee. Hells yeah! 

Filled with sex, drugs, hordes of screaming fans, rock music, dazzling makeup, and even more dazzling costumes, The Runaways was a brilliant film that can only be describes as “so rock n roll”. I fucking loved it!

I love rock n roll so put another dime in the jukebox baby. I love rock n roll so come on take the time and dance with me. 

Batman [PG]

In Gotham City, the streets are riddled with crime. But there is a caped crusader known as the Batman out to keep the criminals in line. But when a new villain, known as the Joker, arrives on the scene, Gotham is unsure what to make of Batman: friend or foe? 

Like Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, and Indiana Jones, Batman has no expiration date. Packed with action, romance, damsels in distress, explosions, surgery, nifty gadgets, and directed by my favourite director, Tim Burton, Batman is the ever popular classic that you can always come back to. 

The streets of Gotham City are overrun with petty thieves and criminals. But there is a caped crusader known as the Batman who is out to scare and keep the criminals in line. Unfortunately, where the most important people are gangsters and criminals, the city does not take too kindly to the masked liberator. That is until a new villain going by the name of Joker bursts onto the scene, creating a cosmetics scare and generally wreaking havoc. As Batman and the Joker go head to head, the people of Gotham are unsure what to make of the caped crusader: friend or foe? 

I can’t remember when I first saw this movie; all I know is that I absolutely love it now… more so after discovering that Tim Burton directed it. I’ve never read any of the DC Batman comics or anything, but my dad tells me that Tim’s portrayal of Gotham City was spot on: dark, sinister, and almost gothic. 

I simply must draw attention to the marvellously manic performance that Jack Nicholson gives as the Joker. After being disfigured by exposure to toxic waste, Jack has to suffer an almost-scary grin for the duration of the film, but he is such a good actor that he can still be sinister and menacing even with a look of great enjoyment on his face. With his manic gestures and expressions, you never know which way he’s going to turn, so there’s always a great sense of anxiety and anticipation as you quickly try to figure out if he’s going to do something less than friendly. 

Just a bit of trivia now: did you know that if Jack Nicholson refused the part, Tim Curry was the second choice? Can you imagine that! Tim Curry as the Joker! I reckon he would’ve done well. But Jack was the immortal genius in the purple suit. 

Michael Keaton stars as the dark knight himself and I have to say that he did very well. It’s not easy playing dual roles and it’s even more difficult when you keep in mind that Michael is really more of a comic actor and this is an action film. He did really well. Rock on! 

Also starring Kim Basinger, Michael Gough, Billy Dee Williams, and Jack Palance, Batman is a classic science fiction movie filled with action, great costumes, gadgets, damsels in distress, bad surgery, romance, and memorable characters. Another classic that is a must-have in any film buff’s collection. 

“I’ve been dead once already… it’s very liberating.”

Killers [M]

Jen is a woman who always thinks about safety first. Having been recently dumped, she goes to France with her parents for a little vacation. Whilst there, she meets Spencer, a gorgeous man who dreams of having a nice and quiet life. The two fall in love and get married. But their perfect marriage starts to crumble when Jen learns that Spencer is an international spy with a bounty on his head. 

What the hell was I thinking when I hired this? The film started off with a bit of potential, but completely lost it halfway through. It was just over an hour of car chases, gunplay, fighting, screaming, and killing. Even the closure at the end was so quick that when the credits started rolling, you’re just left there with a vacant expression on your face and after a pause, you exclaim “what the hell!?” 

Jen has been recently dumped by her boyfriend and is vacationing with her parents in France to try and take her mind of it. Whilst there she meets Spencer, a gorgeous man who dreams of settling down to a quiet and suburban life. Their quick romance leads to a swift marriage and they return home for three years of “happily married”. But their idyllic marriage starts to crumble when Jen learns that Spencer is an international spy with a bounty on his head. As if this isn’t enough for Jen, the majority of their neighbourhood is filled with hired killers who are out to get them. 

The film started off nice and smoothly, easily establishing Jen’s situation and all that, but then, as the romance begins to blossom between Jen and Spencer, everything about the film gets faster. One minute their having their second date in France, the next minute you find that they have been happily married for three years. I think the major thing that caused this film to crumble was the fact that everything was thrown at you so suddenly, that you didn’t really have enough time to register it. 

And the attempt at closure at the end!... What the hell man?! Practically the whole plot is explained in five minutes and then the credits start rolling. I sat there completely dumbfounded, a real vacant look on my face, yelling at the TV “what the hell was that!?” I don’t think the film has any redeeming feature, not even the cast, which includes Ashton Kutcher, Katherine Heigl, Tom Selleck, and Catherine O’Hara. 

A really fast-moving flick filled with copious amounts of gunplay, fist fighting, car chases, and killings, Killers is a craptacular film, one which I don’t think will be making into the collection… ever.

Shrek Forever After [PG]

Shrek has found his happily ever after, but he’s the only one who can’t see that. Wishing that he could have just one day where people are scared of him again, Shrek makes a deal with Rumplestiltskin. But the deal goes to shambles when Shrek finds himself in a twisted alternate version of Far Far Away, a land where he was never born, had never rescued Fiona, ogres are hunted, and Rumplestiltskin is King. Now it’s up to Shrek to undo what he’s done, but can he do it before the day is over? 

I just missed this at the cinemas, but I heard that it wasn’t all that good. It didn’t get crash hot reviews and, in all honesty, just seeing the trailers did not really grab me. But watching it last night after a hectic, but rewarding day at work, I found that it wasn’t all that bad. It had a decent story, the script was fine, and there were some very clever fairy tale and nursery rhyme references. I mean it definitely wasn’t the best Shrek film, but it wasn’t the worst either. 

Shrek has found his happily ever after, but he’s the only one who can’t see what he’s got. He finds himself missing the days when he was a “real” ogre and people were afraid of him. Wishing that, for one day, he could be a real ogre again, Shrek makes a deal with the devious and cunning Rumplestiltskin. Suddenly Shrek find himself in a twisted alternate reality of Far Far Away, one in which he was never born, ogres are being hunted, he has never met Donkey or Puss, he never rescued Fiona, and Rumplestiltskin is King. Now it’s up to Shrek to undo what he’s done, but he’s only got until sunset to do it. 

Ultimately, I did find this film to be a fun one, good for the family, and filled with clever fairy tale jokes and modern interpretations of famous nursery rhymes. All our favourite characters are back, and even some new ones like Rumplestiltskin and the Pied Piper (who was quite funny). 

Really, since the third one, the Shrek films have been going a little downhill, so the fourth and final one shouldn’t be expected to be something brilliant, but I will say that it wasn’t half bad. It had its moments and gained a few laughs out of me and my brother (most probably because the whole thing was rather close to Back to the Future II). Worth the watch at any rate. 

Featuring the voice talents of Mike Myers, Cameron Diaz, Eddie Murphy, Antonio Banderas, John Cleese, and Julie Andrews, Shrek Forever After was a fun family movie, good for a lazy afternoon. 

Lemony Snicket's A Series Of Unfortunate Events [PG]

When a mysterious fire engulfs their home and their parents, the lives of the Baudelaire children literally go up in smoke. The children are then put into the care of Count Olaf, a mean theatre actor who is after their enormous fortune. After foiling his plans to gain their fortune once, the Baudelaire orphans are passed from guardian to guardian, all the while being trailed by Count Olaf and a series of unfortunate events. 

Based on the first three books in the series by Lemony Snicket, A Series of Unfortunate Events is a fun family comedy filled with Italian food, mysterious fires, familiar faces, wonderful costumes, and a happy little elf. Admittedly a lighter take on the original books, and a combination of only the first three, with a completely new ending written for the screen, it’s still a good film nevertheless. 

Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire had a perfect life until it wnet down in flames when a mysterious fire engulfed their home and their parents. Orphaned, the children are sent to live with a despicable and greedy theatre actor named Count Olaf who seeks only to gain the enormous Baudelaire fortune. After foiling his attempt to steal their fortune once, the children are then removed from his guardianship and passed onto another guardian. But all the while, they are being trailed by the terrible Count Olaf and a series of unfortunate events. 

I simply have to draw attention to the thing I love most about this film: the costumes. Old-fashioned style outfits with a slight eccentricity about them, almost a gothic influence. When I first saw this movie, I could not take my eyes off Violet’s dress and there was nothing in the world that I wanted more. It’s gorgeous! 

With a light comedy script to play against the unfortunate events that take place and packed with heaps of familiar faces like Jim Carrey, Emily Browning, Catherine O’Hara, Billy Connolly, Timothy Spall, Jude Law, Meryl Streep, Cedric the Entertainer, Jennifer Coolidge, and Dustin Hoffman, Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events is a fun and very entertaining film, perfect for an afternoon family flick. 

Shark Tale [G]

Oscar is a little fish in a big pond, a really big pond: the ocean. Fed up with being a nobody, he tells a little white lie about him being a fierce and merciless shark slayer, thus gaining fame, fortune, and everything he’s ever dreamed of. But it’s the truth universally known that a little white lie can grow bigger and bigger, and soon Oscar learns that this lie is about to bite him back. 

From Dreamworks, the studio that brought us the immortal genius of Shrek comes this wonderfully fishy and freshly witty underwater animated comedy. Filled with heaps of familiar voices, great animation, and backed by a clever script, Shark Tale is a perfect family movie. 

Oscar is a little fish in a big pond, a really big pond: the ocean. Slaving away at a Whale Wash service and being in massive debt to his boss, Oscar is fed up with being a nobody. But all this changes when Oscar is set to be a shark’s meal and an anchor gets dropped on the shark, killing it. Realising that he could make all his dreams come true, Oscar tells a little white lie about how it was he that killed the shark, thus becoming The Shark Slayer. Suddenly Oscar is living his dream of being a somebody, but it’s the truth universally known that a little white lie can grow bigger and bigger, and Oscar soon learns that his little lie is capable of biting back. To keep his secret, Oscar teams up with vegetarian and outcast shark Lenny and the two become the most unlikely of friends. But as the lie begins to unravel, it’s up to Oscar’s loyal friend Angie to help Oscar and Lenny stand up against the Godfather of the Reef: Don Lino. 

The thing I love most about this movie is the animation. Each character has a subtle resemblance to the actor who provides the voice. Like Oscar and Lola, voiced by Angelia Jolie and Will Smith, both have very full lips. Don Lino, voiced by Robert De Niro, has a mole on the right side of his face. And Sykes, who is voiced by Martin Scorsese, has very prominent eyebrows. Even for the remake of the song Car Wash, done by Missy Elliott and Christina Aguilera, the characters look like how Missy and Christina would look if they were a fish and a jellyfish. It’s really very funny, like an underwater avatar. 

The film is filled with numerous witty and subtle jokes, some of which are spoken and some of which are voiced. And what makes it really good is the strong message about lying, which plays against the visual and verbal comedy. 

Featuring the voice talents of Will Smith, Robert De Niro, Renee Zellweger, Angelina Jolie, Jack Black, Martin Scorsese, Ziggy Marley, and Doug E. Doug, Shark Tale is a wonderful underwater comedy that’s funny for all ages. A perfect Saturday night family movie.